The Touch
of
Angels
September 2022
September 2022
Photo by Israel Torres from pexels.com
A Difficult Time of Transition
My husband and I have just moved from overseas. We were homeless, but my family kindly took us in. We lived out of two suitcases whilst we hunted for a house to buy. This process took much longer than anticipated, as it turned out to be 13 months before we finally completed purchase on a house.
The time we lived with my family was good, but (as is normal when it comes to families) there were challenges. We braved these challenges as best and for as long as we could, but one Sunday, it all became too much for me.
Struggling to Worship
That particular Sunday, my husband and I went to church (Wellspring, Watford) as we normally did. I thought I would make myself feel better by singing the worship songs that I love so much. Indeed, very often the Holy Spirit would fill me with joy while singing worship songs. But that Sunday, no matter how much I sang, my heart became more and more sad - to the point that I could no longer sing.
I came to a stop, conscious of an intense emotional pain in my heart. I couldn't accurately describe it, it was nothing like I had felt before. I couldn't continue to sing, but I remained standing with everyone during the songs.
A Call to Cry Out
As I stood there waiting for the songs to finish, the pastor interrupted the flow of worship. He read a portion of scripture from Psalm 34:
Psalm 34:17-18
17 The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them;
he delivers them from all their troubles.
18 The Lord is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
Then he said, "There is someone here who is crushed in spirit"
Suddenly, I realised that he was describing how I was feeling. It was not just emotional pain in my heart, it was my spirit being crushed! Yes, that was it! That description hit the nail on the head!
Now that I understood what was happening to me, my tears began to flow profusely. The pastor then continued,
" If that is you, put your hand up. "
As he said that, I was struck with the conviction to own up and to put my hand up. However, I felt myself getting very embarrassed - there was no way I could put my hand up and let everybody know I was hurting! So I just stood there, hiding my feelings, making sure that my arms were by my side.
Seeing that no one had put their hands up in the congregation, he said once more,
" If that is you, put your hand up. God wants to heal you. Don't be embarrassed! "
Argh! His words convicted me so deep like a sword through my heart, I knew it was God talking directly to me. God knew I was feeling embarassed and He was calling me out. It was now up to me to decide how I should respond. I had only a short window of time to do so before the moment would pass me by, and the opportunity be gone forever.
Prayers of Healing
I was hesitant, afraid, embarrassed, nervous all mixed up into one. But time was ticking, so I had to respond quickly without anymore delay.
To my surprise, I felt my hand suddenly go up - so so high - as if for everyone to see! All this happening against every feeling that was churning inside of me.
The pastor saw me and said, "Well done!" Then he asked people to go over to pray for me.
Now that I had been detected and identified (so to speak), I felt people touching my back to pray for me. I felt at least half a dozen hands, plus the hand of my husband who was standing next to me.
I began to feel very hot and sweaty, and began to worry that I would sweat too much through my blouse. I didn't want the people's hands to get damp with my sweat -something that I felt sure would be unpleasant for them!
Then a man and a lady came towards me. The man held my hand that I was still holding up, whilst the woman placed her hand on my left shoulder. They prayed for a while with the songs playing in the background as my tears continued to flow like rivers from my eyes.
At last, the songs came to an end, and I felt all the people's hands being lifted off me. I said thank you to the man who was facing me and then to the woman who was at my left shoulder. I also then wanted to turn to the people behind me to say thank you to them, too - but as I tried to turn, the woman at my left shoulder grabbed to hug me for a few seconds.
By the time I managed to turn completely, I saw that everyone behind me had sat back down. I didn't know who had prayed for me, so I sat myself down to continue attending the service. I had in mind to ask my husband later if he had noticed who they were.
The Touch of Angels
After the service finished, my husband and I walked home. It was then that I asked him if he saw who had put their hands on my back to pray for me. I wanted to say thank you to them next week.
To my surprise, my husband said,
"There was no one behind you who prayed or laid hands on you. It was just my hand on your back."
I was shocked and protested,
"Seriously! Really?! But I felt at least half a dozen hands on my back!"
He iterated,
"No, there was no one behind you who touched your back."
I was stunned. I was 100% sure there were hands touching my back because I remembered getting really hot and sweaty, hoping that they didn't get damp hands from my sweat.
I began to wonder if they were angels sent to pray and minister to me? I gasped at the thought of that possibilty! And so I said to myself,
"If indeed they were the Lord's angels sent to pray and minister healing to me, then I would surely be healed!".
Confirmation of Healing
Sure enough in the following days, as I searched deep within my heart and my spirit, I no longer felt the anguish that I had felt that Sunday. The pain in my heart was no longer there either. I felt whole again with renewed hope, and I had a spring in my step. How odd, but how wonderful it was, too! This must be how it feels for the soul and spirit to be healed. It was an incredible experience.
I was, once again, able to cope with the challenges of our living conditions. The week went well, and Sunday came around again.
As I went back to church, I went to find the man and the woman who had prayed for me. I asked them both independently whether they had seen anybody behind me praying for me. They both said, "No". As far as they were concerned, they were the only ones praying for me alongside my husband. This confirmed what my husband had said to me!
I was once again in awe, being now fully convinced that God had intervened for me that day. I rejoiced at the knowldege that they were angels sent to minister to me. Without a shred of doubt, I had felt their hands on me.
I praised God with all of my heart, and with immense joy and thankfulness. He knew having a crushed spirit was unbearable for me. Indeed,
Proverbs 18:14
The human spirit can endure in sickness,
but a crushed spirit who can bear?
So He sent His angels to touch me, and through them heal me. How amazing that He cared for my little needs without even being asked! He is a most wonderful and incredible God!
Believing without Seeing
In the weeks following, I discovered that the whole service was recorded and uploaded on YouTube. So in great excitement, I searched for it and watched it online with much anticipation. I wanted to see those angelic hands!
The video captured the stage and people's back during worship...... but to my huge disappointment, my husband and I were just out of the camera's field of view. How frustrating! I was so desperate to see the hands that touched my back. But knowing God, He had already planned for things to happen this way. I was not meant to see them, but rather to feel them - in faith - after all it was all done to accomplish the healing that I so much needed. That was the divine goal.
As for me, I am happy to simply be thankful for the healing given to me, and to believe without seeing - for Jesus HImself said, it is a blessed thing:
John 20:29
... blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.”
© Elma Larsen. All rights reserved